To My Utter Bemusement, They’re Making A Tetris Movie

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So, there is a lie in the title. They’re not planning to make a Tetris movie.

They want to make three of them.

Since I’m aware that simply writing the word “why” over and over again does not a compelling blog post make, I shall actually try to use other words to describe my feelings on the matter.

Ok, I’m just going to ask “why” one more time. Why? Why do they want to make movies based on Tetris? More importantly, how are they going to make movies based on Tetris? It’s a puzzle game. The point is to stack blocks so they make lines across the bottom of the screen. Then the lines disappear. That’s it. That’s as close as the game comes to having a plot.

According to the link above, this is coming through a partnership between producer Larry Kasanoff (who worked on the so-bad-it’s-good Mortal Kombat movie) and a Chinese company called Seven Start Works. According to an article on Deadline.com, the movie is going to take place in China with a primarily Chinese cast. So it’s got that going for it, I guess.

Again, the game has no plot. There is literally no story here besides a bunch of falling blocks. I just don’t see this working.

Unless it looks like this:

That would be fucking amazing.

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